Russia and Ukraine: AT WAR!!!

How will the Russian and Ukrainian wrestlers respond to the ongoing Russian invasion and annexation of Crimea whilst going head to head on the mat? 

Quite civilly as it turns out. Russia put the beatdown on Ukraine in the final match of Session 1 of the 2014 FILA World Cup, 7-1, but there didn’t appear to be any bad blood between the two squads. This is despite Valddy Daddy Pooty Poot flexing Russian military muscle inside the previously sovereign Ukrainian territory of Crimea. 

This is probably due to the fact that most (if not all) of the wrestlers on the Russian National Wrestling team aren’t actually “Russian”. That is, they don’t speak Russian, aren’t adherents to the Russian Orthodox Church, don’t identify as ethnic Russians, and come from territories that often aren’t too pleased about being autonomous republics of the Russian Federation, like Dagestan for example.

And so the ideals of Western Civilization’s favorite pederasts, the ancient Greeks, are alive and well inside the LA Forum this evening. 

And I will say, the “Russians” looked strong. They are probably the most entertaining wrestlers in the world, and any opportunity to watch them in action is a treat. I know it’s the week before the NCAA Tournament but there are a lot of American wrestling fans that are missing out right now. 

Also being missed out on is St Paddy’s day, by me. But don’t worry, a six pack of Coors Light and the FILA World Cup is all this partial Irishman needs to celebrate that dumb island and it’s stupid heritage. At least it’s a good excuse to knock back a few tall cold ones, anyway.

I’ll be back at 9:30 EST for another geopolitical barnburner: USA vs IRAN! Ben Affleck just wet himself!

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